Bill's Page

This is me — Bill. I am a Cat.

I created this webpage with my Mac Powerbook using BBEdit.

I was an only kitten. I was born on August 20, 1980.

On my 17th birthday my people left me alone and went to listen to William Gibson read from his new book. They brought me a signed copy of Idoru, but it isn't much fun to play with and doesn’t even taste very good.

I have lived in this house my whole life, though I do go outside a lot. (I have my own door.)

About the time I was born, my dear friend Emily—I think of her as a big sister—looked pretty much like this:

Well, that is the way people look to us cats. Sort of weird, little fur, and in greys and blacks. The eyes aren’t right somehow either....

I think this Hamster Dance site is about the funniest thing I have ever seen. When I showed it to my person she about fell off her chair so she is not allowed to watch it while I am sitting on her lap. The dancing jars of Vegemite, with their happy little song, come a close second.

I don’t know much about the cosmos, but I do know that there is a nebula named after ME (sort of) called the Cat’s Eye Nebula. We cats are never inclined toward simplicity, so it should be no surprise that this is one of the most complex planetary nebulae known. The bright central object, though not as attractive as my golden eyes, may even be a binary star system which I’m told is pretty impressive.

I have a friend who has a hamster that I am NOT allowed to play with, so sometimes I play with Judy's Rat. I am told that rats laugh when they are tickled, but I don't like it one tiny bit. In fact, I tend to remind people who try to tickle me that I do have claws and fangs.

This Quiz Board is all about ME which I find fascinating. Connecting the question about ME to the right answer about ME makes a little light go on, but pouncing on the wires is the best part.

I have this great nagging sort of “reminder” noise that drives my people totally crazy. I may record it for posterity.

My mom died awhile ago. She was even older than me—probably a year older at least. No one knew for sure and she never said. She lived at someone else's house before I was born but they were not nice so she left and came here. She liked here best. She was a tutti-frutti cat.

I am NOT named after “Bill the Cat” from Bloom County. I was named Bill first.This is not to say that Bill the cartoon character doesn’t share some of my qualities....

My whole name is William of Orange. My mom used to drop me down into an old outdoor barbecue to keep me safe while she was hunting so I often emerged covered with soot like the lizard named Bill in Alice in Wonderland. (Chapter IV: “The Rabbit Sends in a Little Bill”) So that is why I am Bill.

I know that it is no longer the year of the tiger, but I'm not about to put a picture of a bunny on my page unless I can find a striped one. My friend Andrea tells me that I have to make it through the year of the Dragon, Snake, Horse, Goat, Monkey, Rooster, Dog, Pig, Rat, and Ox before we finally get back to a proper cat-type year.

My web page was black for a while. I was protesting something but I also liked it black because my old buddy St. Paul (a cat) was black, mostly. We hung around together (sleeping much of the time) for about 14 years (real years, not dog years).

Now I have tried to make the background to show you my color—sort of, anyway. I am not sure I have gotten it exactly right, since I can’t see in color, and I am a bit weak on my hexadecimal color codes.

I still learn things. Recently I learned that it is not a good idea to sleep under the wheels of a rolling desk chair. Sleeping on TOP of wheels is completely safe, though, as I demonstrated long ago.

My old friend Fooly (a cat) was really smart. He came from the SPCA in San Francisco, which must be a college or a university. Fooly would blast through the cat door and not even hit the ground until he had to make the turn into the kitchen where the FOOD is.

I am still looking for a picture of Te Honu Iti (a cat) who lived around here for a little while. She was maybe even smarter than Fooly, but she had had a rough life before we found her at the animal shelter and brought her home.

I only know what I like. Do you think this is art? Someone made that accusation, and I am trying to find out.

I wanted to go to the summer Olympics and spent hours practicing my diving form. That part I was good at, but the wet bit at the end didn't suit me.

I was honored to hear that the first rock Sojourner met on Mars was named after me, though I don't understand the Barnacle part.

I do have an email address and will answer your message when I wake up from my nap. (Sleeping in the sun in the computer room is my favorite indoor activity.) You can also visit the web page of my person, who is starting to have white stripes in her fur, just like me.

And here is a famous cat who used to live in the White House with a famous guy named Bill.

I thought I was the only cat with a web page. But no...

Tisiphone and Finnegan were once feral cats.

I try to keep this page up to date. The last time I could fit it into my schedule was 12/17/99.

Note: Bill died on January 8, 2000 at the age of 19 years and 4 months. He would want you to keep thinking of him.
I updated this page for him on 1/2/05.